Why does it take something drastic for all of us to realize the important things in life? This is a question that's been on my mind since I can remember, and I still don't have a good answer for it. (which is kind of emberrasing since I'm the advice guy and all) I recently had a friend pass away, completely unexpected, and it's amazing to me to watch how everyone reacts to the event.
There is alwayws the person that is closest to the incident who takes it the hardest. Fortunately in this situation she is an amazingly grounded individual, so she understands and is taking it all REALLY well. I guess as well as anyone could.
Then there are the people that were close to her who take it hard enough to say they are going to change their entire lives. They alwasys say things like, "This put things really into perspective." Most of the time I find that these people will change things for a little amount of time and then go back to their old ways.
Then there are the people like me, who knew this person but aren't super close to the situation. I'm more tied in through knowing the people that were really close to the person who is gone. I've been struggling with how much do I approach the people and talk to them, and how much to I just give them their distance so they can work things out on their own. It's even harder for me since I've gone through losing someone very close to me. I feel like I can really relate to them and actually mean it when I say, "I know how you're feeling or I understand what you're going through." Some people say that and you just look at them thinking, "No you don't." So, this is my dilemma. Right now I'm just kind of sitting in the middle. I know I don't want to bring it up to often and reopen the wounds every day, but I also just want the people to know that I'm here for them whenever they need someone to just listen.
Sometimes, that's all you need is someone who will just listen.